If you’re daughter didn’t win the pageant, don’t miss the unique opportunity to walk away from that loss with new feedback and perspective on how to improve.
It’s ok to be disappointed. That is a perfectly valid feeling but being angry at others not ok. It is not the judges fault. It’s not the director or coach’s fault. It’s not the system’s fault. The only person who needs to improve or change is you and your girl. It could be that on this day with this particular set of judges another girl just shone brighter. It doesn’t mean your daughter wasn’t amazing. It was just someone else’s day. How you respond to a loss will be felt very deeply by your child. It was her after all that put herself out there to be judged. If you celebrate her successes and the exercise of her confidence on stage, she will walk away confident in her performance knowing she did her best. If you are angry, you rob her of that confidence and devalue the hard work she put in. Its not easy to step out on that stage. You can make or break her experience, confidence and memory of the day with your reaction. Here is your chance to learn and help her prepare for the future.
Some things to take away and work on for the future…
Did you invest in the proper coaching/training?
Did you provide the right wardrobe/equipment?
Did you study the handbook?
Do you know the pageant system inside and out?
Are you making sure your daughter wants this as much as YOU do?
If you didn’t answer yes to all of those questions: re-evaluate and refocus. You can’t just spend hours dreaming about the win. You got to spend hours working for the win. AND still realize, it might be someone else’s time to shine.
It’s best to check that attitude because there’s already another girl out there already back at practice, reviewing pageant footage and planning her next competition. We win or we learn and we always have a good time!
Need more on competitive parents… Check out Six Riveting Tales of Ultra-Competitive Parents.
